Q&A

Thanks to one and all for sending in your queries regarding your life changes (and the changes of those in your life), and the increasing awareness of well, ah, awareness! For those who’ve had their questions answered (whether or not those answers have been posted on this page) I thank you for your responses regarding your readings.

Again, I wish to congratulate those who’ve responded to my Q&A readings with a new attitude about their lives. We’re all in this together. Know time like the present and life becomes a gift.

VIRGO

My name is Cynthia. I have major changes going on. I am about to begin the process of divorcing a man who I stay married to because of many reasons, but I never felt him to be my true love or “soul mate.”  I am being pursued by a man who I have been in a close relationship with for over 5 years and who is also in the beginnings of a divorce. His DOB is 01/14/1954.  My feelings for this other man have always been that he could indeed be the love of my life, as the connection and attraction are beyond anything I’ve ever thought possible. These are first marraiges for each of us that we are ending, by the way. My DOB is 9/21/1958, in Bridgeport Connecticut. I have suffered tremendous losses and grief in the past few years including losing my mother and my most beloved dog last year, and I could use some hope. What do you see?

Thank you in advance,

Cynthia

Cynthia, you sound as if you’ve been through a lot of endings and it’s wearing on you. Divorce can be draining but also freeing if you learn how to change your patterns that convince you that what you are doing is your truth. Sometimes we don’t know until we know. with that said. give yourself some time after your divorce to be by yourself. I’m not saying forget about the guy you have true feelings for…I”m saying, give yourself time alone.

Think about 7 years ago and the stop signs life put up in front of you. You needed to make changes then, and you’re m aking them now. Be thorough with these endings. Grieve your mom….your puppy and discover who you are. When you’re with another person, you tend to lose yourself. That’s why alone time is m uch needed.

The energy between you and the Capricorn man you’ve known for the past 5 years is karmic one– which means the two of you have unfinished business. Whether you choose to have this be a romantic relationship or merely a platonic one is what will unfold as life progresses. I can see that you feel very comfortable with him and he with you.

But take the time you need for yourself to see what behaviors of yours made you think you needed to stay married to a man who is not a true love—whether initially or developed.

These patterns of yours tell you that it’s safer to have details in place then to have an intimate relationship—and intimate does not mean sex…it means IN TO ME YOU SEE. Intimacy means you allow someone to see you, know you, all parts of you, esp the critical parts you don’t want anyone to see.

The self criticism is what you  need to start healing or you’ll be putting yourself in a position of second class citizenship again. It’s not about how amazing another man is…it’s about your standards for a relationship. First, you must have an amazing relationship to yourself. Love who you are. Have boundaries in tact. Be strong for yourself and stop worrying so much about HOW it’s supposed to happen. Be aware that your thoughts create your world.

What thoughts would you like to think now that will create an equal relationship, without you having to take a back seat or having to always take care of someone else? Are you a nurse or a doctor? If so…then you need be paid for caretaking…

If you’re not…then you need to have healthy standards in place for an equal relationship in CAREGIVING. Give and take…equally.

Divorce is the last ending for a while in your outer world. What needs to change inwardly is how hard you are on yourself, how critical you’ve been on yourself, and a plan of action that enforces you as an equal player in all relationships. This includes career relationships as well.

Weed out the nonessentials in life—from what’s in your closet to the people who no longer resonate who you are becoming.

The end of November marks a more free flowing time with endings.. let them happen before the beginnings begin. Clean out your closets (physical ones and emotional ones) and you make room for what’s possible. Be light…be light….BE LIGHT.

Around Oct of 2009, next year, your Capricorn Man is though his changes and ready to live a more authentic life. At that time, you’re ready to commit to plan of action for yourself that involves communal and mutual respect and joy. If your Cap guy has plans for you and you’re not okay with those plans and don’t say anything…

OR if your Cap guy is depressed or falls ill, then you’ll be faced with having to care-take someone else…which means you’ve not changed your patterns. And you’ll go around the same block…so pay attention NOW.

Have a standard for a relationship.
Have a voice for equality.
See the signs that your relationships are reciprocal.
Stop denying yourself your dreams.
Work toward a mutual goal.

And by next thanksgiving of 2009, you’re living a whole new life!
Blessings.

My name is Vicky, I was born 19 September 1969 at Greece the name of the town is Thessaloniki at 8:30 am.  My problem is that after a long relationship I had, Im now alone for 2.5 years and I wonder when I finally meet my soulmate….(if exist soulmate) answer me if is possible to astrology to prevent something like that!
Thank you for your time
Bye from Greece!!!!!——–

Hi Vicky,

Thanks for your email.
The first thing you need to do, is to examine your last relationship. Buy a book called, “Keeping the Love you find,” by Harville Hendrix PhD. Understanding your needs and your patterns will save you years of heartache in any relationship!

You’re a Virgo Sun, Libra Rising, and Sagittarius Moon. The way you interact with the world is via your mind. It’s important that you help yourself become more comfortable with BEING before the next possible partner comes around….and that’s going to be very soon!! (if it hasn’t happened already)

You crave to have a relationship, but you also need to be focusing on YOUR needs and not what a partner can give to you. You’re very investigative, and need to lean more toward TRUSTING THAT YOUR NEEDS ARE MET.

You’ve got a lot of fears about being alone, but that’s only due to age and lack of experience. Inside of you is a wise, spiritual knowing. Bring it to the forefront and stop making your mind go in circles!

You have a dual sense of partnership to begin with. You desire someone to take over, yet you have a very specific way in which you’d like this person to behave.

What you expect from a partner, you need to be enacting yourself. Keep this in mind as you experience a new type of relationship in the near future.

The guys who are in need of mothers usually find their way to you. Stop putting out those “I’ll take care of you” vibes! And start to take care of yourself or you’ll be left with a guy full of temper tantrums when you  start to grow more and branch out on your own.

If you read the above book, pay close attention to when a potential guy starts to depend upon you to be his emotions for him, without taking the time to feel them himself!! Then you know it’s time to show him the door and time to allow the best person possible to enter your life.

February is the month to look at any man in your life from father to boss to co-worker to brother, as a mirror to your own behavior. If you don’t like what you see, then learn to set a boundary to it!

Start by saying, “NO,” to these little boys in men’s bodies by maturing. Who you are is who you’ll attract.

Then say yes to equality.

By September, 2005, oh, boy! –I mean, Oh MAN.